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Questions to Ask Before You Commit

Michael Basta


It has been documented that as a relationship progresses over time the number of open ended questions (such as "What are your favorite bands?", "Where have you traveled and where do you still want to go?", or " What do you see yourself doing in the future?") that partners ask each other tend to diminish. Close ended questions (such as "Did you feed the dog?") tend to dominate. Gottman has shown that couples that do well tend to stay curious about each other and continue to ask more open ended questions. 

This article by Kelsey Borresen from the Huffington Post suggests some interesting open ended questions for  couples considering long term commitment to ask each other. The choice of questions is very well considered in that they open up space for conversation about very important topics, such as the meaning of commitment and betrayal, how to fight, life dreams, attachment styles/need for connection vs. space, sexuality, boundaries with extended family, and sharing of responsibilities. Well done! CLICK HERE TO READ.

Michael Basta